3 Things Destroying Your Confidence and What to Do About it

 

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So you don’t feel confident? Let’s talk about, sister! Many times we think we don’t feel confident because of what we look like. We think that if we changed the way we look then we will feel more confident. Is this actually the case? Will changing our outside make is feel more confident on the inside?

To be 100% real with you, I don’t think so. Your confidence is tied to so many other things aside from your body. If you change these things, you can change how you feel about you yourself. That’s why in this episode, of Embrace Your Real, I’m going to dive into 3 things you may not realize are destroying your confidence and what to do about.

If you loved this episode, I know you will also love….

230: An underrated tip for feeling more confident in your body


TRANSCRIPT:

Hey hey beautiful human. Can I steal five minutes of your time? I have something super important to share with you, but I promise I'll be really quick. You're listening to my weekly bonus episode of Embrace Your Real with me, Julie Ledbetter. I'm about to give you a quick tip for building your confidence, honoring your body and unconditionally loving your authentic self. Stay tuned if you're ready to embrace your real. Let's get it. Let's go.

So what do we do when we don't feel confident? Well, I want to talk about it on today's bonus episode. I think many times we think we don't feel confident because of the way that we look. We feel like if we change the way that we look, then we'll feel more confident, but to be a hundred percent real with you, this just is not true. Your confidence is tied to so many other things aside from your body. I personally, in my personal life, my confidence first and foremost comes from my faith in God and that is where I draw my confidence from on a daily basis.

But on a very practical level, there are so many other things aside from your body that your confidence can be directly correlated with. So if you change these things, you could also change how you feel about yourself. So that's what we're going to be talking about in today's bonus episode, I'm going to be diving into three things you may not realize that are destroying your confidence and what to do about it.

But before I dive in, I wanted to share this super sweet review from Brian Hoshchild. Sorry, if I did not pronounce that right. They gave a five star view and said, "Thank you Julie. This podcast is so fun and makes my nutritional goals seem so much easier. As a fitness and nutrition guru, helping others I still need someone to talk to me. Julie does that and I appreciate her simple way of educating that leaves a big power punch."

I love this so much and I couldn't echo it more. I believe that every coach needs a coach. Every mentor needs a mentor and it's so important to have those people in your life that are pouring into you as you're pouring into other people. So I'm so grateful that this podcast is helping you and that it is leaving a big mark in your life so that you can go on and you can teach other people as well. It is a ripple effect and I absolutely love that. If you haven't already rated and reviewed the podcast, you guys probably already know what I'm going to ask you. All you have to do is go to Apple Podcasts and just type in Embrace Your Real. Today is the day that you go to any Apple device and type in Embrace Your Real and leave a review. Like I said, it really does help us out and it is my one ask of you. If you can do that.

If you don't have an Apple device, but maybe a friend or a coworker, just steal their phone and say, "Hey, I have to do something really fast for this sister. I'm helping a sister out." If you do that, that really does bless us and it also just helps other people that stumble upon the podcast. They typically read the` reviews to see if it is a right show for them. And we are just on a mission of helping women to inspire them, to honor their bodies through movement, mindset, and nutrition, as well as embrace their real. The name of the podcast, living an authentic life and dishing you some real talk from week to week. So thank you in advance if you do that, I appreciate you so much.

Let's dive into the three things that are destroying your confidence and what to do about it. Number one, your habits. So if someone is failing to nourish their body, or maybe you're never moving your body, or you're speaking to yourself poorly, how are you supposed to feel confident in your body? It truly is a domino effect when it comes to your habits. So if you have unhealthy habits, you will not feel good in your body. When you don't feel good in your body, you're not going to feel good about yourself. When you get around other people, you're going to feel even more self-conscious because you think poorly of yourself, and then you're going to assume other people will as well. This is why I truly believe that confidence can play a huge factor and really starts with the way that we treat ourselves. So the better that we treat ourselves, the more confidence we can have and project.

So if you nourish your body, if you move your body, if you honor your body, then you will feel great in your body. For me, because I have faith in God, I believe God has gifted me this body, this amazing body that does so many incredible things for me on a daily basis. It's the least that I can do is be a good steward of my body. So by being a good steward of my body, that's nourishing my body, that's moving my body. That's honoring my body. That's speaking to my body lovingly and when I do, I feel really good in my body. So if you are struggling to feel confident in your day to day life, evaluate how you're treating your body and what changes you can make to your daily habits that could help you feel better in your body.

Number two, your knowledge. So this could be at work. This could be in your workouts at the gym. It could be honestly a wide array of scenarios. In the scenario of work, sometimes we feel self-conscious giving a presentation or speaking on a topic because we don't actually feel like we know what we're talking about. Maybe we just need to admit to ourselves that we need more knowledge, or we need to spend some extra time doing research to fully understand the things that we don't quite understand. Or getting up to date on new trends or whatever it may be. So then when we speak, we can feel fully confident in what we're saying and what we're doing.

If we know what we're talking about a hundred percent, then there becomes no reason to feel self-confident. Then there really becomes no reason to feel self-conscious or lack confidence in that. Now in the scenario of gym or working out, maybe we feel self-conscious because we don't know if we're performing an exercise right. In this case, I would recommend that you go, you figure out what exercises you're going to be doing in the gym. You watch tutorials on them for correct form. You're practicing the form at home if you have it without weights so that then when you go to do the workout, you feel more confident in it. Once you pick up those weights, when you have people watching you if you are in a public gym, then you won't feel so self-conscious while you're doing it. So definitely it's just honestly about practice.

It's about sometimes you need to humble yourself and you need to say okay, I am not an expert in this and I want to learn more. So become a student. I think after we... For me, I did go to college, but after college I was like I'm never going to be a student again. Well, really I am a student of life and I think when you adopt that mindset of being a student of life, you can learn so much and it blesses you beyond your wildest dreams. When you can really become a student from day to day and let people, and situations, and things teach you on a day to day basis, you'll be so much better for it. You will grow in your character. You'll grow in so many different aspects of your life. So if you are lacking confidence in aspects of your life, whatever that scenario is, do the research. Become a student of life and humble yourself and just learn, learn, learn, learn.

Number three could be our standards. So are you holding yourself to maybe an old standard that you set for yourself a year ago or five years ago or 10 years ago? If so, why do you think that the standard that you set back then should be your standard today? You're constantly changing. Your life is constantly changing. You're evolving as a person. The person that you were back then is not the same person that you are today. The person that you are today has different needs, different priorities, values, responsibilities, abilities than the person that you once were. So you have to be honest with yourself and determine whether or not your old standards make sense for your life today.

Then you have to ask yourself what you were once capable of accomplishing may not be realistic in this season of life. It also, quite frankly, may not be what you need to accomplish now and that's completely okay. As you evolve over time, your standards also evolve with you. Asking yourself too are your standards too high? In this world we are constantly being told that we need to set our standards higher. So I think that it's really important that you go inward on this and you ask yourself, what are the standards that I'm going to live my life by? Not let anybody else dictate that. Don't get me wrong. I think having extremely quality standards is important for living a happy and successful life. But sometimes we set these standards for ourself based on a highlight reel of something that we see on Instagram that is not even real in reality.

Then you find yourself drained. It's deflating. You feel like no matter how much effort you put in, it just doesn't matter because you're never enough. You're never doing enough. You're never being enough. Honestly, that just goes back to again, what are the standards that you're living your life by and who and what is dictating that? For me, that's God, that's the Bible. That's the holy spirit. I am living my standards by that. I'm not living my standards by the worldly standards. So again, just recognizing this and knowing that it's important that you are setting standards for yourself that align with your values and who you are and who you want to be.

So definitely so, so, so important for that because standards in and of itself, they can take away from our confidence if we are constantly trying to measure up to something that's unrealistic or trying to live to a certain standard that just doesn't align with our values. So again, it always goes back to being true to what you believe, your values and those things. So at the end of the day, I think we have to go inward and we have to figure out what are the standards that we're going to live our life by? When you do that and you are true to yourself and you're aligning those to what you value most, you will find confidence in that.

So there you have it. Those are the three things that could be destroying your confidence and what to do about it. We have your habits, your knowledge and your standards. If you love this episode, I know you will also love episode 230, an underrated tip for feeling more confident in your body. I will go ahead and link that in the show notes below so that you can easily go listen. I give you some real talk on really diving in and feeling a lot more confident in your body. I have tons of other podcasts on confidence as well. If you just scroll through, I guarantee you will find one that will be a real talk or a pep talk for you.

So I hope that again, that you found this episode helpful. If you did, you can screenshot this and post it up on your story. You can also tag me. I love connecting with you guys. I love seeing where you guys are from, what your aha moments are for each podcast. Thank you so much for tuning in and I'll talk to you in the next one.

All right, sister, that's all I got for you today. But I have two things that I need you to do. First thing, if you are not already following me on the gram, be sure to do so, Julie A Ledbetter. Yes, it's with an A in the middle for that daily post workout real talk, healthy tips and tricks and honest accountability to keep your mind and heart in check. The second thing, be sure to subscribe to Apple Podcasts to never miss an episode.

Thank you so much for joining me. It means the absolute world and I'm going to leave you with one last thought. The most beautiful women that I have met in my life are the ones who are completely confident and secure in being authentically themselves. Remember that beauty goes so much deeper than the surface. So go out there and embrace your real because you're worth it.

 
Julie LedbetterComment